Friday, November 11, 2005

Some Dream-y Dream Gossip!

ITEM! Your intrepid dream reporter has done it again. This time he's gotten a certain member of Elephant Larry (hint: he likes scoring touchdowns!) to admit to his deepest darkest fear...tables!

Just this past weekend, one ELer related a chilling tale of a nightmare he had. He would enter a room, not unlike any other room, except for the inordinate number of tables. He would then exit the room and upon re-entering, the tables WERE PUSHED TOGETHER.

Was it ghosts? Was it invisible people? It did not matter what it was because it was frightening beyond belief to the Executive Assistant to the Executive Vice President and Chief Operating Officer in question. There was even a request for a certain "Mommy"! Who is this mystery mommy? You know the DreamSquad is on it!

AUTOITEM! To prove Your One True G-sip Columneer is not immune to a dream or two He-self, let me tell you about a horrifying dream I had in Washington the District of Columbia JUST this past weekend.

I was in a building, made entirely of glass. Everyone in the building was trying to run away, but they knew it wouldn't work. Why? Because there was a SKY TRAIN COMING. That's right, an entire locomotive, all in red, complete with boxcars and a caboose repeatedly smashing through the building and taking with it swaths of this somnogossipologist's friends and loved ones!

What was the last crucial element to this dream? An absolute certainty that I was going to die! Utter and complete doom!

I also woke and went back to sleep twice, but the Sky Train kept coming! No one is safe from the Sky Train. Not even the waking.

Only in your brains, kids, only in your brains!


mary said...

this post was thrilling! i was on the edge of my seat! and then i remembered my dream last night, that included all of you dudes. yes, i dream about you guys. in this dream, we were all hanging out at a park by the river (i don't know where specifically) when suddenly there was an explosion at the old jail on the other side of the river, and all of the inmates ran to swim across the river and kill us. it was pretty scary. good news is, we fought them and lived. awesome...

Chris S. said...

The only way to take control of the SkyTrain is to have either Don Cornelius host it or Quad City DJs ride it.

Come on. It's the choo-choo.