In my local coffee shop is the following lady: Crazy brown hair, sweaty, about five or six barettes. She has two giant Duane Reade bags which I later learn are full of family size bags of tortilla chips, and snack size bags of doritos.
Lady: Salsa? You don't have salsa? IT'S CINCO DE MAYO AND NOBODY HAS SALSA! I'VE BEEN TO FOUR DIFFERENT STORES AND NOBODY HAS SALSA.I later realized this lady was probably putting together her company's super-sad Cinco de Mayo party. Which made the whole thing kind of depressing, because that means there's probably an office out there composed of people who thought it was a good idea to send this lady out to get chips and salsa for their party.
[I'd like to remind our reading audience that we're in a coffee shop.]
Lady (Cont'd): What? You do? No, I need salsa. Yes. Salsa. No, I'm going to need at least three of those.
[Pause]
Lady (Cont'd): I've been to four different stores and nobody has salsa.
Happy Cinco de Mayo?
Update: Then I burst into tears.
3 comments:
So, was she talking to a waiter at the coffee shop about the salsa? Or was she on her phone? Or was she talking to you? I'm confused. Either way, it's crazy, I'm just trying to figure out what kind of crazy.
Now you got me crying.
Waiter? Dude, you go to much nicer coffee shops than I do.
It was mainly to the guy behind the counter (who, it turned out did have salsa), and also to anyone else in the store.
Which was just me.
Honestly, it was mostly directed to the salad bar.
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