Sunday, August 27, 2006

Best Part of Snakes on a Plane

[Scene is 11am showing on Snakes on a Plane, in a 300-400 seat theater, filled with maybe 10-15 people. Movie ends, I walk out of the theater, there's a regular looking guy with a baseball cap waiting for me. Who I don't know.]

GUY: Hey, so they never showed the trial.

ME: What? <-- This is me confused because this guy is talking to me as if we've already been in a conversation for several minutes/went to see the movie together.

GUY: The trial, they never showed the trial of that guy Eddie.

ME: Oh, I guess not?

GUY: Probably a done deal, huh?

ME: Yeah, probably.

MY THOUGHTS: Oh, he's probably going to knife me right here. What a weird way to die.

GUY: Hey, those snakes went crazy.

ME: Yeah, I know.

MY THOUGHTS: Maybe he's trying to pick me up. Is this a thing? Do gay men go to see movies at 11am on Sunday mornings and pick each other up? I don't remember hearing about that.

GUY: What was it again? It was the flowers? Did you understand that?

ME: They sprayed the flowers with pheremones.

GUY: [blank look]

ME: [A little louder] They sprayed them with pheremones.

GUY: What are those?

ME: Pheremones?

GUY: [blank look]

ME: They're like horomones.

GUY: [blank look.]

ME: They're like chemicals that drive snakes crazy.

GUY: Oh, cool. Great movie, huh?

ME: GREAT movie.

THE END

Oh, almost forgot:

***SPOILER WARNING***

2 comments:

Clinton said...

Hey, again, it was REALLY great to meet you. You smell fantastic!

Anonymous said...

I think horomones are those chemicals that make Aries ram things with their head, and make Cancers crabby. I'm no Ivy Leaguer, though.