Tuesday, February 08, 2005

dEATh?

Hey check it out: the Times profiled this weird guy that lives in my neighborhood. Why? Because he has a doctorate in not eating anything at all. I especially like the article for the two sentences that will probably never ever be spoken ever again:

1) "We call her Arctic Fox, but her real name is Jennifer."

&

2) "...and I absolutely live off my own urine."

Ha. I believe Stefan's commented about breatharianism before, in regards to the Shredder's dietary habits. And Jesus Christ, Geoff wrote a whole freakin' feature about it just last week. Watch out Banks and Tivo and Lindsay Lohan and Interrobangs and Elephantitus. There's a new EL obsession in town.

In related news, when my wacky neighbors aren't drinking their own urine, they're stabbing each other with cane blades.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

There's nothing I wouldn't do for just one precious cup of this man's urine.

Jeff said...

Another sentence in this article that will probably never be written again (though not for the same reasons):

"...he had been spotted surreptitously eating a chicken pie."

Perhaps it would not be funny if the author had written "chicken pot pie" (which was probably what she meant). But for some reason, I'm imagining a chicken pie as pretty much a whole chicken, feathers and all, stuffed into a pie crust. I also picture the breatharian guy eating this chicken pie behind a tent at a carnival, feathers sticking out between his teeth as he shoves mouthful after mouthful of chicken into his starving gullet.

I just made myself a little sick, but I still think it's funny.