Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Committed To Nothing

Part of my job involves visiting the apartments where my clients live. My clients, being cared-for mostly by middle-aged women, often have daytime television blaring loudly in the background. As a result, I have watched far more "General Hospital", "Dr. Phil" and "Texas Justice" than I'd care to admit. Another show I often unwittingly watch is "The View."

Usually "The View" is pretty predictable. The lovely ladies select a topic, discuss it and talk over each other like in the hilarious SNL parody. The second half of the show is often reserved for fluffier pursuits, like fashion and finding the best deals. Today's episode, featuring a pajama party, was no different, with several models entering wearing fashionable pajamas.

One of the pajama ensembles was a sexy tank top/boyshort/open button-down shirt combo, "so you don't have to steal your boyfriend's shirt!" Everything seemed pretty much normal until the model turned, showing that the boyshorts said on the back of them, "Committed to Nothing." The designer of said pajamas said that she thought this was a good message, since it promoted abstinence.

Thus began the maelstrom. Instead of tidily moving on to the next set of stylish, classy pajamas, the ladies of The View took issue with this conservative viewpoint, with such quips as "If she doesn't want to have sex, maybe she shouldn't be wearing something like that." Which in turn led to the defensive designer insisting "I think it's a good message! Teenagers should know they don't have to have sex to be popular!" Special guest-host Hilary Duff then chimed in, also bashing the prudish pajamas.

I think the best part was the model who was forced to stand there waiting for order to be restored. Her clearly plastered-on smile faded more and more each time the camera came back to her, until it looked more like a photo of someone mid-sneeze than a smile.

But it was OK, cuz everyone in the audience got a pair of pajamas.