Wednesday, October 12, 2005

Q: Why Does A Dog Lick Its Balls?

A: ‘Cause it can!

I always thought this joke was funny. Especially when people just ask it rhetorically, like they’re trying to prove a point. That’s great.

It’s customary, as a dude, just after telling or hearing this joke, to spend the next five minutes hi-fiving other dudes and saying, “Yeah! That dog’s got the right idea! I mean, any creature that can lick its own balls would obviously do it ALL THE TIME. I bet millions of dogs just die from licking their balls all day instead of eating or sleeping or anything! YEAH!”

But, having thought about it, I don’t think I like this joke anymore.

You see, last night I realized: if I were somehow suddenly granted the magical ability to bend over and lick my own balls, I don’t think I would do it.

Why?

Because I have absolutely no desire to lick my own balls.

That’s right, I said it! I’m a dude who doesn’t want to lick his balls all day. Sure, maybe that makes me gay or something, but I’m sticking to it. Stupid joke.

6 comments:

Alex said...

I'll lick your balls, Chris.

Anonymous said...

Well there we are. Line forms behing Alex.

Chris S. said...

It’s customary, as a dude, just after telling or hearing this joke, to spend the next five minutes hi-fiving other dudes...

Hi-fiving? Or the new hotness hi-fiving?

Anonymous said...

like ALL dudes, i have found myself in the "would you suck your own dick if you could" discussion. this is generally accompanied by some standard "i'd be out of a job if i could" jokes. but a couple years ago i changed my stance from "yes. that would be rad" to "...not so much". i've decided that, of the basic 2, the "greater sensation" (for lack of a better term) would probably be "i'm sucking a dick" rather than "i'm getting my dick sucked". as a result....i'd still have my day job.

(for the record, my day job HAPPENS to be blow jobber...so this is kind of mute point)

dusty

baz said...

washington mutual does give the best blow jobs

Anonymous said...

wouldn't it just be another way to masturbate? Like, "wow, both my arms are tired. I guess I better stop masturba.... oh wait! there's another option! awesome!"
If I could suck my own vag without it being really uncomfortable, I totally would. That would be pretty sweet.