Ahem

I’m worried the cough I’ve been nursing over the last few days is starting to make me look like an attention-craving prick.

Whenever I clear my throat, it sounds exactly like I’m saying “Ahem.” It’s the kind of “Ahem” you see in cartoons, or written out in comic books when some uptight character’s vying for the attention of some other, usually cooler character.

And though constantly Ahem-ing sucks (and having to force more violent, realistic coughs just to prove that I am actually sick), I’ll admit there’s something slightly neat about experiencing Ahem naturally and first-hand. It’s kind of like the first time I ever saw stars when I felt dizzy, or hit my head really hard and then felt a bump rise up—reminders that even the stupidest cartoony clichés are actually based in some sort of reality.